Aria & Jamie Break Up!

Aria Milazzo and Jamie Weiss have officially called it quits!

Say it ain't so!

The rumor mill was already buzzing with the news that the wedding of the century had been cancelled by Jamie after certain family issues were brought to light.

What we didn't expect was that Aria would be the one to officially end the nearly 8 year romance!

Then again we shouldn't really be surprised.

An unnamed source confirmed to us exclusively that Jack "Homewrecker" Lexington and his infamous kisses were the real reason behind the break up!

Scandalous!

Now that Jamie is single, we wonder when Belle Marie will make her move.

Jack already has! And he wants his ex-wife back!

Patrick and Claudia Hooked Up! Um... WTF?!

We just received confirmation that Patrick Delton is a full-fledged masochist!

Before our weekend getaway, Claudia Weiss was head over heels in love with Anthony Delton, playa du jour, while Patrick Delton has wanted to get in Claudia’s pants since he met her. He calls it “love” though!

Right.

Now that we’re back, we are finding out that Patrick "I'm Pathetically In Love With Someone Who Doesn't Feel The Same Way" Delton, is currently in a 'serious' relationship with Claudia!

What the effing fuck?!

Word on the street is that she gave up on Anthony so she could give Patrick a real chance!

For what point or purpose? It truly escapes our reasoning.

We personally believe that Patrick and his new sex-cretary, Eleonora Milazzo, would make a much cuter and balanced couple.

After all, she has proven from the beginning that she would actually WANT Patrick, not like Claudia who has CLEARLY proven the love of her life is Anthony.

How do we put this gently? We don't like them together... AT ALL.

We want Claudia back with Anthony! Who else is going to provide us with awesome catfights with Jacqueline!?

Patrick, we are sending you our copy of "He's Just Not That Into You". And Aretha Franklin's song "R-E-S-P-E-C-T"!

Here’s hoping you can take a hint!

Happy 100 Posts To Us!

It's official!

Gossip Guy has 100 posts! And because you don't reach such an important milestone without a big reveal we're going to tell you a very well kept secret until now...



We have exclusive information and paperwork that proves that the lovely speshul snowflake, Belle Marie Weiss, is not an actual Weiss. Not by blood at least.

And it gets better...

We've always found it a bit INTENSE just how much she gravitates towards 'little brother' Isaac James Weiss.

Some of the Weiss household staff have even gone to say that Snowflake is in love with Jamie and that her forbidden love was the reason she ran away to New York!

JUICY!

Happy Friday everyone!

The Ultimate How-To-Break-Up-Couples Guide!

How To Break Up Couples In 3 Simple Steps (Jack Style!)



Step 1: Meet a desperate teenager trying to become an actress while being confused about the man back home. Pop her cherry. Make her forget about said man. Have sex with her like every day is judgement day. Be with her for six years as her animated vibrator. Make her fall in love with you. Realize said woman doesn't know who she wants. Engage in fun flirtation as the girl actively pursues the other guy. Make her jealous every time, all the time. Even when she thinks she wants to be with the other guy, grab her and slam her against a wall and remind her who gave her first orgasm by example. And while she's making up her mind...



Step 2: Decide that the completely asexual girlfriend of the man who is between you and your fuck buddy becoming an actual couple is an object of your interest. Take her out on a series of dates so she can start growing feelings for you. Make up a special nickname for her. Afterwards, try to make a pass at her. When she shoots you down because, DUH- she has a boyfriend, make a fuss and swear you will never speak to her again. The mind fuck will be so big that she will go to you in the middle of the night and realize she likes you real bad. Get her dumped. Move in with her. Once you've stolen her, decide she's actually still too green to be in a 'grown up' relationship with you. Move unto the best friend.



Step 3: Bond with a gorgeous blonde woman who is the best friend of the asexual being and is engaged to her hot tempered brother. Come to the conclusion that you two have sucky privileged lives and that you love her legs. Get a really inappropriate crush. Desire her legs wrapped around you. Go to Las Vegas with her and get married because you just like pleasing sad women who haven't gotten married. Get an annulment. Get beat up by the fiancee. Don't learn your lesson. Attempt to get a threesome between asexual being and engaged best friend. Do everything in your power so that wedding doesn't happen and she ends up in your bed.

The Ultimate How-To-Be-A-Playa Guide!

How To Be A Playa In 3 Simple Steps (Anthony Style!)


Jacqueline

Step 1: Remember the ex that broke your heart? Decide you still want her in your life, turn the tables, and make her pursue you like a puppy dog. Move in with her. Kiss her sweetly and blush so she thinks you're sensitive instead of the sleezeball you actually are. After some wit-less banter, decide your dick needs some action and slam her against a wall where you will proceed to tongue-fuck her. Realize that your tongue down her throat is not enough and rub yourself against her so hard your clothes will spontaneously combust for at least five entire minutes. Don't let her come. Leave her panting and wanting more.

Bonus Step: Get interrupted by a call from your fuck buddy on your cellphone. That makes her remember that you're still prime meat.


Elizabeth

Step 2: With your super penile powers, make a delusional sociopath fall head over heels for you. Thanks to your talents, she will start giving a fuck about her appearance and explore her much hotter side. Go to where she works and kiss her in front of the staff she spends so much time trying to intimidate with her mean stare and pretty much render her a blushing mass of a strawberry. Tell her you'll see her tonight for possible cherry popping.


Elizabeth... again.

Bonus Step:Take a cute picture of her with your cellphone and assume no one will see it so you can enjoy it in private... until someone hacks your phone and sends to your favorite gossip source!


Claudia

Step 3: Between the dry humping in the morning and the cherry popping at night, schedule a lunch and an afternoon fuck with your favorite fuck buddy who just happens to be completely in love with you. Prove you're happy to see her as to not shatter her hopes for the 15th time and kiss her on the street in front of the institute where the desperate actress and sociopath are currently held.

And that's how you do it, boys and girls!

Hospital Showdown!

And the claws come out!

Someone just sent us a tip about how the shit hit the fan in the hospital where Jack Lexington is currently admitted.

According to an unnamed source that works there, Jacqueline Reinard showed up at Jack's room and acted like Queen of Sheba, even telling him that she was going to spend the night to keep him company! Only little snowflake Belle Marie Weiss wasn't having it and outright told Jacqueline that her presence wasn't required or desired!

OUCH!

Poor Jackie!

You can pretty much guess Jacqueline didn't like that one bit and proceeded to explain to the mere mortal how she can do whatever she pleases!

We were quite surprised to know that Snowflake held her own and even called out Queen Jackie on how a not so fortuitous phone call from her part caused the rupture between Belle and Anthony Delton!

Snowflake, didn't you get the memo? You're playing with the big girls now. And this is how the queen plays!

Jacqueline left the hospital vowing she would be on Jack's side the following night.

Now we wonder... what would a conscious Jack have to say about this?

Spotted!

Spotted: Belle Marie Weiss arriving at an undisclosed posh London hospital to see beat up Jack Lexington.

Great moment to show him how much you care about him above everyone else, snowflake!