Guru James Strikes Again! Carlotta Milazzo Showered in Diamonds and... Hesitation?

James Weiss had some choice words for his new fuck-buddy-turned-employee Eleonora Milazzo at lunch hour!

After hearing about Eleonora's disastrous attempt at a 'friendship' with Phillip Weiss, his sour puss cousin, James laid down the line.

Accusing her of seeking the attention of stone wall for four hours instead of spending time with him and being girl that enjoys boys while he was a full grown man, James said that he's free of drama and because of that Eleonora suddenly considered him entertainment and not the real thing!

We do agree with you there, James. Milazzo girls sure love the drama! Then again, you've had plenty of experience on your side with your first Milazzo girl, right?

It comes with the package, Jamie! You can't be too surprised by it.

Rendering Eleonora speechless (a theme lately!), he excused himself to share a bite with Lyle McGregor.

Speaking of scotsmen and the lasses they fancy...

Former beau of the Whore of Babylon and Director of Communications and Strategy for the current UK Prime Minister, Lyle McGregor has been romancing a very coy Carlotta Milazzo!

Showering Carlotta with diamonds (thanks to his good friends at Harry Winston) and very late night caps, it seems that the scotsman is hell-bent on winning this race to Trophy Wife-ville!

All the attention has been making Carlotta nervous and hesitant... it could be that twice divorced Lyle must know a thing or two on how to get a woman.

Or that she's still a girl and he's a man.

Regardless of age, one thing we know for certain... sparks and diamonds are flying high and we have a feeling this might end up with Carlotta walking down the aisle very, very soon!

Question is...

Who is going to be at the end of that aisle, Carlotta? The puppy or the scotsman?

Spotted!

Spotted!: Michaela Stokes dressing up as our favorite sex-cretary!

What on earth could've possessed her to do that?

Could it be that Phillip Weiss couldn't get it up unless he had a certain unruly brunette nearby?

Props to Mika for being such a sport! Not many women have the stomach to dress up as the woman their husband lusts after!

Or is this the opportunity the Queen of the Dumped needs?

Nobody knows!

Awkward! Phillip Weiss Freezes Out Eleonora Milazzo!

Uh-oh!

Jamie Weiss' new sex-cretary and recent divorcée, Eleonora Milazzo was caught in rather awkward encounter with bon-vivant turned psychiatrist turned house wife Phillip Weiss this afternoon.

The two coincided at a coffee shop and what promised to be a friendly run-in turned sour quickly!

Eleonora, Queen of the Dumped, attempted to re-establish her friendship with Mr. Michaela Stokes but she was promptly DENIED by the handsome doctor!

Why so serious, Phillip? Didn't they teach you to play nice at the southern playground?

No matter how many times Eleonora insisted or tried to make conversation with him, onlookers said that Phillip was as talkative as a potato. The more she tried, the more he invoked his potato silence. He only broke it to say that he and Eleonora had never been friends!


Ouchie!

After that Eleonora left with the tail between her legs instead of a gorgeous man by her side.

We had wondered why these two had grown so cold so suddenly.

Sources say that our favorite sex-cretary was developing feelings for the married Phillip! And as way to avoid any problems, because lord knows Milazzo girls are an indecisive, greedy bunch, she did the strangely mature act of quickly removing herself from the situation leaving poor Phillip high and dry!

We'd be resented too! Though Michaela would definitely have none of that in her tightly run household, now would she!

Worry not, Eleonora. We are sure James Weiss would be more than happy to lick your wounds before he sets you free! After all, that's what all your men do... right?

James Weiss Being a GQMF!

A divorce and a brand new sex-cretary has not stopped James "Jamie" Weiss from being devilishly handsome and not to mention, incredibly fashionable at his latest events celebrating his clients.

We’ve seen the debonair agent in suits including cream, pale red and bright blue and we have to say we are loving it!

Excuse us while we clean the slobber off the sidewalk.

What can we say?

The Milazzo girls sure know how to pick 'em! It's also good to know that they love to share!

Princess Victoria of Wales is Expecting!

Our prayers have been answered! And in what way!

Princess Victoria of Wales is pregnant... and unmarried! We are to have a real royal baby conceived out of wedlock!

We are nearly dying of excitement.

The pregnancy has been kept hush-hush by both parties as both the princess and sperm donor Ian Weiss prepare to tie the knot in a lavish, shotgun ceremony to be celebrated Wednesday June 26th in an undisclosed location.

While the palace refuses to issue a statement, a source close to the couple revealed the wedding plans AND the bun in the oven!

We think Ian finally paid attention to his overly superstitious mum and followed her advice when it comes to weddings:

Monday for health, Tuesday for wealth, Wednesday best of all,

Thursday for losses, Friday for crosses, Saturday for no luck at all

Congratulations to you both!

Jacqueline Reinard is Preggers!

Not only did Logan Lexington put a ring on it, he also put a baby on it!

After more no's than yes' to her baby daddy, our favorite try-hard Jacqueline Reinard is pregnant with her first royal child.

We hear the baby came as a complete surprise to at least one of the would-be parents (hai Confused Pussy!).

Forgive us as we yawn in the middle of this post but all the people joining the incubator club are MARRIED!

How absolutely boring.

The announcement has made Belle Marie Weiss fly the Lexington nest to Soho House, while she waits for her NYC apartment to be finished. We don't blame you Snowflake! After all, if one of our soulmates decided to reproduce while you tempted him in-house we would've run away too!

Guess you lost your magic or... do you have an announcement of your own? Could there be two Lexington babies on their way?

Fingers crossed!

Spotted!

Spotted!: Professional socialite Carlotta Weiss Milazzo looking impossibly stylish as she arrives to New York City yesterday as part of what we can only imagine is Eleonora Delton Milazzo's boo-hoo crew.

Though both recently divorced, taking into consideration the amount of suitors Carlotta is gathering (including a certain ex-husband of a certain younger sister), we are putting all our money on darling Charlie as the winner of who won't end up alone contest!

Best of luck, gorgeous!